Recently I was at a new employee orientation training with some of our new clerks and cashiers.

Also, in attendance were two of our managers who I had been working with to co-present at the training. 

When I entered the room, the managers were already there with some of the new employees.

Right away I knew something was off.

The managers were casually slumped in their chairs – nonrelational to the new folks.

As we started and went around the room answering some “get-to-know-you” questions, the managers were pretty laid back and not really present in their answers. 

They were being super-casual – acting like new “disoriented” employees themselves.

My insides clenched, I could feel my confusion and frustration. My mind was chattering “Isn’t it obvious that their behavior is not setting the right kind of welcome and tone for the orientation training. Arg – what the heck!“. 

We finished the training.

I knew I needed to follow up with them and I knew my insides were feeling some heat so I turned my attention to sorting myself out a bit before checking in.

As I reflected, I could see the problem was not that these managers were “blowing it”, it was more about them being super-casual at a time when they were expected to be intentional and set a tone of leadership.  

This insight along with some deep breaths calmed me down and I was ready to pull them into a huddle.    

First, I asked, “How did today’s session go for you?”

Overall, they thought their session went well and had a few suggestions for how it could be better – that was fair.

Then I asked, “What about the time before your session began and during the intro round?”

Both stared at me blankly, almost as though they couldn’t remember.

I said, “Here is what I experienced. No engagement with the new employees and lackluster participation in the intro round. It was casual, not intentional – It was though you were not mindful of your position and the kinds of impressions and impacts we have as managers.”

They got it right away and we chatted a bit.

During our conversation here are a few more things I said.

“When it comes to managing, casualness often can be cited as one of the reasons that things go south.  We all want to be real, genuine and authentic when connecting to staff, however it is important for us to remember that what is real, genuine and authentic right now is that we’ve agreed to be a manager here at the co-op. We need to remember to fully embody that role when we’re here.

Of course, setting a casual vibe has its place yet it needs to be intentional and thoughtful to our role. As managers we want to remember we are always leading and steering staff’s attention  – either consciously or unconsciously. 

This is the way it is.  When we‘re a manager, every moment is a managerial moment – we are all called to be alive and aware of how we want to spend it.”

The managers I was talking with are super-wonderful people and like many of us just needed a little nudging. They took our conversation well, and fast forward to the training that followed they knocked it out of the ballpark!

It’s not easy making that jump to being a manager – who wants to be “on” all the time? It takes time, patience and practice and eventually it becomes second nature.

The first step is just accepting the changes we’ll go through.  

It’s a path of becoming and being intentional.